HUMOROUS WORDS AND THEIR DEFINITIONS:

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NEW!!! Hillbilly Medical Terms

Benign................What you be after you be eight.

Bacteria...............Back door to cafeteria.

Barium.................What you do with dead folks.

Cauterize..........Made eye contact with her.

Colic...............A sheep dog.

Coma...............A punctuation mark.

Dilate.............To live longer than your kids do.

Enema.............Not a friend.

Fester............Quicker than someone else.

Fibula............A small lie.

G.I.Series.........World Series of military baseball.

Hangnail...........What you hang your coat on.

Labor Pain..........Getting hurt at work.

Morbid..............A higher offer than I bid.

Nitrates............Cheaper than day rates.

Medical Staff.......A Doctor's cane, sometimes shown with a snake.

Node....................I knew it.

Outpatient..............A person who has fainted.

Pelvis...................Second cousin to Elvis.

Post Operative...........A letter carrier.

Recovery Room....Place to do upholstery.

Secretion.......Hiding something

Tablet..........A small table to change babies on.

Terminal Illness....Getting sick at the train station.

Tumor...............More than one.

Varicose............Near by

 

 

The Washington Post's Style Invitational asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition. Here are some recent winners:

Intaxication: Euphonia at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.

Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.

Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.

Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.

Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.

Glibido: All talk and no action.

Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.

 

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